whoa is me

23. Masters Degree. Wine at 12pm. This sounds like fun, relaxation? No this is depression. I have never been a person to say im depressed or i have never seen the glass at half empty but right now i think my glass is completely empty. Im drowning and i feel like giving up...or maybe I already gave up. I do not know. I moved to Atlanta April 9th and I thought I was doing the right thing, but since I've been here it is like i have been on a complete downward spiral. I moved here with all good intentions you know, I'd find a job, a man or a man then a job. I'd be happy. Im not happy. Im not sad. Maybe, I need a psychic or as a christian im supposed to say a prayer. But i think God is tired of me or maybe im not praying right. im drowning and there is no one to save me. I'm so desperate for a miracle that im drinking wine at 12pm. I think Jesus broke up with me. There are strippers who have their life together more than me. I am drowning in debt. And depression is seeping into my soul. How many times can i say im not happy. im sure i have reached my limit of complaints. i just wanna be able to pay my bills. on time. i just want to be happy. i just want to be debt free. why is it so hard. what was the point of me going to college? it was a crutch in adult hood. they said go to college so youll find a good job, go to graduate school so you can get more money...brahahahahahahahahaha just a fuc!!!!! joke. these degrees dont mean anything. when i have a child, he or she will be a disney star. stars are the only recognition to success. all of the congrats and well wishes dont mean shit when i cant pay my bills. i was just happy and then i got stuck right back in depression...maybe i shouldve stayed in detroit, got pregnant and then my blessings would have come. maybe i shouldve never went to college and then been a stripper and i would be ok.

it aint no sin

the only way to get to success is wrong by wrong....
she didnt say that, but that is what I internalized from that...you get to happy by doing wrong...think about all successful people they have all been criminals or over-sexed

so here are some amazing quotes

A hard man is good to find.
Mae West 


A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars, that's subtraction.
Mae West 

A man in the house is worth two in the street.
Mae West 

A man's kiss is his signature.
Mae West 


Any time you've got nothing to do and lots of time to do it come on up.
Mae West 


Don't keep a man guessing too long - he's sure to find the answer somewhere else.
Mae West


I only have 'yes' men around me. Who needs 'no' men?
Mae West 

I only like two kinds of men, domestic and imported.
Mae West 

I see you're a man with ideals. I better be going before you've still got them.
Mae West 

I speak two languages, Body and English.
Mae West 


It isn't what I do, but how I do it. It isn't what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do it and say it.
Mae West 


Sex is emotion in motion.
Mae West 

She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
Mae West 

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.
Mae West 

admitting

I could walk away as soon as I meet someone new. I could leave you but I am truly still in love with you so I need to move on with a person. A living breathing loving man. 

or I could never date again because I am emotionally drained and scarred but I don't wanna be a bitter woman. 

I don't wanna be a lonely woman either but I don't wanna be a woman who needs a man. I feel like a woman who needs a man. I feel like I need him. When I broke up I felt like I needed him. I am an angry woman, an emotional woman, but it is all backed up love. 

what the fuck happened to the red jeep wrangler?? 

i hate the red jeep wrangler and everytime i see one i cringe